Day 14 - I Get By With A Little Help From My Friends

Two weeks have gone by. This is the start of week three. Wow.

After all I have personally been through these past few days, and believe me its been a roller coaster ride, I still have much to be thankful for.

Yes, getting across the quad with one good leg in 15 minutes is extremely taxing on the upper body and doing this with people staring, judging, can be incredibly taxing for someone of weaker personal beliefs and confidence.

Yes, going up and down stairs is quite the show for even the most indifferent passerby, but yes I have managed to gracefully transgress every step in my way with a simplicity and ease that speaks volumes to an onlooker and makes them recall a time they saw a true guru be at home in their respective field.

Yes, getting my meals at dining facilities is a two, sometimes even three person job and I am only talking about the getting the food part. The whole getting to, getting inside, waiting in line, and eating (god forbid I forget my fork at festival when I sit down with my Tweed Farms) is a whole nother task that also requires a great deal of effort and makes me almost want to not eat at all (but to those that help you are all welcome for the special access parking that I provide).

Yes, waking up in the middle of the night to go urinate is not as glamorous as it once was. Yes, dealing with hangovers in the morning is a lot tougher with limited mobility. Yes, the opposite sex still does hit on me and sequentially attempt to close which I must say I am often not in the mood for after long days of walk- I mean crutching.

But negativity and complaints and ranting aside, after these past two weeks, and this past weekend especially, I have really began to learn about myself and began to truly accept myself for what I am these next 6-8 weeks. I am a temporary handicap, and I am damn proud of who I am.

I am not quite sure what caused this learning and appreciation of thy self to take place, but I guess it has something to do with the love and acceptance that rains down upon me by my peers and teachers when I attend class or by my friends and potential suitors when I arrive at a party.

Today when eating at lakeside (which I am sad to say has no handicap access- yes I man'd up and crutched up and down those stairs), my food preparation specialist decided to walk my sandwich out to me instead of calling my number and having me crutch over and pick it up, that was sweet of him.

This weekend a sweetheart with beautiful hazel eyes, brown hair, and a smile that could pierce the skin of a rhino from up to a 100 yards away, fell for my crutches (or maybe it was my incredible charm and ambition combined with my high level of optimism and eddie murphy laugh), and suggested that we lock ourselves away for the next three days to do nothing but make love and order take out.

Unfortunately I had to decline.

Being a temporary handicap, its important to watch what we eat given our limited mobility, although in hindsight it would've balanced out with a different activity but oh well, she was good for fueling my ego and filling my cup, I thank you for that darling, call me this weekend.

Yes, life may seem good to you two legged people, but thats only what you see. You don't see the day to day struggle we go through. The baths instead of showers. The sleeping with one leg elevated. The emptiness of not having every bone full and whole. Its tough. And I regretfuly need to say that a few of my friends have ended up joining me and departing on their own journey as temporary handicaps.

First there was Col. Trautman. A devastating injury that makes my broken fibula look like a mosquito bite on the inside of a fat kids thigh. He too was injured on the battlefield. Being the ranking officer and having much more couch time than I do, there is something to gain from him. This weekend I had the good fortune to learn a few ways to bedazzle my crutches as well as make them more handi-capable. Yes, frosted gold tips and a cup holder made of duct tape may soon be in JR's future but I will wait and see what else this clever bastard has up his sleeve. God speed in your recovery Colonel.

Then, most recently, there was Mousa (my good Pakistani friend from Rambo III). His was a tragic accident caused by that jackass Murdoch who left me to die in Rambo II (also left me at the hospital waiting for a damn ride). It seems Murdoch really is an a**hole, but thats a different story. After causing harm and breaking Mousa's fibula while out at a celebration he seems to think a few purple hearts and some McDonalds will take the pain away. Mousa, Trautman, and I know this is a bunch of political bullsh*t. Hey Murdoch, what don't you try giving him the 6-8 weeks of this life back. Mousa was a trooper though and managed to radio some friendlies to get him out of the hot zone. I wish you the best and look forward to seeing you living your life (ay ay ay), one crutch at a time with us by your side.

So to Trautman and Mousa, I know its tough and we shall overcome (as we do everytime). I want to leave you newly handicapped with this; when I was aiming my arrow (no pun there) at Lewis' eye (no pun there either) in my 4th movie, I was really giving him advice about being temporarily handicap, so rembember this:

"There isn't one of us that doesn't want to be someplace else. But this is what we do, this is who we are. Live for nothing, or die for something. It's your call."
- John Rambo